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August 2005 Archive

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I'M THE FIRESTARTER (published 27 August 2005)

Twisted firestarter, Mike Watson, MSP, has admitted having a "right good laugh" by throwing matches and petrol all over the Scottish Parliament. "Let's have a heated debate!" he cackled maniacally. When questioned by the polis, Mr Watson remarked he was only trying to recreate the film, 'Blazing Saddos'. Click here for DVD.



My Favourite ThingsMY FAVOURITE THINGS (published 26 August 2005)

From the team that brought you the classic 'Sex and Drugs and Sausage Rolls', a quality video by the Tartan Specials featuring most of what makes Scotland special:
My Favourite Things




CRUDE OIL TRADERS (published 26 August 2005)

Floor stalkers (or whatever the hell they're called) on the New York Stock Exchange have been taking their status as crude oil traders far too literally.




PENGUIN PARLY PALAVER (published 20 August 2005)

Newly promoted king penguin, Nils Olav, has been made an honourary MSP, taking over responsibility for Fisheries and Chocolate Biscuits. When quizzed over the appointment of an antarctic mammal to a senior ministerial position, a Parliamentary spokesman said, 'P...p...p...p...p...p...piss off!'




SAVE THE POST OFFICE (published 19 August 2005)

An impassioned plea from the heart from those wunnerful Flash and music maestros Eclectech and Johnny B. Watch and weep: Save the Post Office




LEITHSTOCK (published 12 August 2005)

This Sunday (14th) sees a spectacular free concert launched at Leith Market. In association with Out of the Bedroom (see the OOTB website for details), Leithstock offers an alternative to the official Fringe Sunday and features the cream of Edinburgh singer/songwriters and acts from further afield. Whyte & Mackay will naturally be making an appearance. And there are guaranteed to be no jugglers. Come on down!






I'M NAKAMURA - GET ME OUT OF HERE! (published 12 August 2005)

by James Kelly

TWO uncles of Celtic's new Japanese signing have recently been found in the jungle. They were surprised to find out that the war was over, they had a nephew who had signed for Celtic, and there was a German pope. They were even more surprised when Ant and Dec asked them to participate in a bushtucker trial.



KWIK FIT FIX SHUTTLE (published 5 August 2005)

Those cheeky Farmer's boys have cashed in on the space shuttle woes by introducing a free tile check with every spacecraft brought into their forecourt.




THE RECKLESS FRINGE (published 5 August 2005)

Catch the Reckless editorial team at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe on the Radio Blah Blah show. See the Radio Blah Blah website guest page for details of when Whyte & Mackay are playing. Oh, there'll also be some funny people there too.




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