99% of Gargoyles Look Like Bob Todd (Half Man Half Biscuit)
Jesus Christ, come on down!
If you've ever wondered how you get triangles from a cow
You need butter milk and cheese and an equilateral chainsaw...
In debt I owe someone a fiver
Maybe I should try my hand at drag
James Dean was just a careless driver
And Marilyn Monroe was just a slag
99% of gargoyles look like Bob Todd
Mary had a little lamb, the doctors were astounded
Everywhere she went gynaecologists surrounded
They've been cooking on Blue Peter now they're sampling the dishes
'I don't normally like tomatoes, John, but this is delicious!'
The son of Jimmy Clitheroe is shouting out,
'Where's my Fiorrouci?'
The Krona rumours spread, but they didn't tell the bread
Did you honestly think that they would?
And if eight out of ten cats all prefer Whiskas
Do the other two prefer Lesley Judd?