There seems to be plenty pornography
On the internet, just have a look
It never ends, virtual friends
Are waiting to come in your facebook
But that's old hat, everyone knows that
Now there's PCs that vibrate and tickle your feet
They judder and they spasm and they induce an orgasm
Until you press ctrl, alt and delete
Porn free
It's filthy but it stops you getting bored
No more sticky pages anymore
But it's probably best to wipe down your keyboard
When I was young we didn't have such fun
Dirty magazines were found in the woods
Vaseline on the lens, men had stars on their bellends
And everybody looked like damaged goods
Porn free
Log on, log off, no matter what your gender
Don't forget
Wipe your hard drive if you are a sex offender
I've a great idea how to make money out of porn online
It's called 'Shagons Den' somebody get me Duncan Bannatyne
He practices the rhythm method with his wife, he shouts,
'I will not be investing with you this evening, dear, I'm out!'
Porn free
But if you want to pay for it, there's extras
Hand relief
Is twice as fun if you are ambidextrous
